The Tone Deaf Minstrel

Mousey the Minstrel was renown

For his ‘talent’ in his singing

His tone deafness, to him, unknown

Villagers’ ears would be ringing!

For those who heard his awful voice

Would howl in pain and hold their ears

“Give us silence and we’ll rejoice!

We’ve tolerated him for years!”

One night when Mousey was in bed

The townsfolk made an evil plot

“We’ll cut away those strings instead,

Then all his songs can be forgot!”

The folks crept up to his small house

With a ladder to the first floor

“We will creep in through like a mouse

And his songs will be nevermore!”

They approached his bed, scissors ready

To cut the strings of his dear lute,

Holding their weapon a-steady

When one man tripped! SMASH! “Shh!! Be mute!”

“Hey! Who goes there?” the dwarf cried out

Poor Mousey’s heart was now racing

“How did all of this come about?”

Standing now, to the group facing.

“We wish you stop and hear us speak:

You are tone deaf, silly Minstrel!

You do not hum, you rather squeak,

You do not sing, you simply yell!”

Mousey replied, boastful and proud

“I am a dwarf of Khazad Dum,

Yes dwarves will shout, I am allowed!

Now leave me be or I’ll kick your bum!”